TARA REBELE lives in Athens, Georgia.
This piece is written for one person to perform the
roles of both Una and Trece. The switch from Una to Trece
is indicated when the performer confronts her image in a
mirror and switches voice from the first person to the
Una, the character in the first person
Trece, the character in the third person, the image in
Cue Card Holder, stands next to the mirror, raises large
cue cards to the audience
ALL CAPS indicates content of cue cards
[ ] indicates stage directions
There is a full-length mirror facing the audience. Cue
Card Holder stands next to the mirror holding large cue
cards. When Cue Card Holder raises a new card, there is a
break in action long enough for the audience to read the
card. During the break, the performer freezes in place,
then resumes after the break as if never having stopped.
[Skipping in with her hands cupped in front of her as if
carrying a bug.]
Im bringing home a baby bumble bee,
wont my mama be so proud of me,
Im bringing home a baby bumble bee
Shit! That little fucker just stung me!
[She opens hands, drops bee, stomps on it. Faces
I feared the bee until I squashed it.
Feared that lil bee until I squashed it dead.
I usually only bite if Im asked nice. Real nice.
And I usually like my bees contained,
where I can keep a close eye on em.
When I was a kid, I used to cut holes
in the tops of peanut butter jars,
then run around my yard stomping on bumble bees,
not hard enough to kill em though,
just kinda quick to stun em for a minute.
Id scoop em up and put em in the jars
that Id fill with fresh grass and dandelions.
Then Id wait for em to make me some honey.
Id talk to em, give em names, fresh flowers,
and not one of em ever gave me any honey.
But it sure didnt stop me from trying.
When I got older I finally learned
the difference between bumble bees and honey bees.
Youd think my parents mightve told me about
that back then,
but no, they just let me run around,
stompin bees with bare feet, trying to pet them,
thinking if I could make them like me,
they just might make me some honey
to put on my peanut butter sandwiches.
But no, my parents never said a word,
they just pulled out the stingers and gave me antibiotics
every time one of my little pets stung,
cuz bee stings make me swell up like a blimp.
No one ever thought to tell me Una, youre
to bees, they sting you, you cry, you hurt
and the damn things are never gonna give you any
No one ever told me that bout friends, lovers or
I always have to learn things the hard way.
I feared that bee until I squashed it.
I like my bees contained. And I sure like my honey.
I wanna taste my honey.
Mmm mmm mmm licking my sweet sweet honey.
I only feared that bee til I squashed it.
Someday Im gonna grow wings of my own,
gonna fly fly fly so high above... beyond...
WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN
Someday Im gonna bite when Im not asked.
Someday, Im gonna remember who I was yesterday
and know who I am today.
And theyll get together for honey tea
and maybe theyll be okay.
Holding hands theyll go skipping
down the sidewalk, looking
for tomorrow, next week, next month, next year...
[Una turns toward mirror, sees her reflection.]
SHE PREFERS TO DANCE ALONE
I didnt invite you, Trece.
NO PARTNER TO LEAD, SHE JUST DANCES CIRCLES AROUND
I dont need you, ya know. I can be alone.
I can be like Castor without Pollux. Ginger
without Fred. I can dance alone. I am...
[Looks in mirror]
Who am I?
[Looks away, puzzled.]
SHE USUALLY DANCES AROUND TOUGH QUESTIONS, TOO
I am the queen bee.
I am a Gemini.
I am Una.
I am a lone dancer.
I am Una and
I am a lone...
The answer was not stated in the form of a question.
THIS IS JEOPARDY
Who is Una?
Last night I was Dorothy, clicking
together the heels of my ruby reds.
Theres no place like home,
Theres no place like home.
Theres no place...
HERS IS THE THIRD HOUSE ON THE LEFT
[Una faces the mirror, switches to Trece]
Last night the Wizard got pissed and dropped Una back to
the yellow brick road on her ass. Seems she didnt
know what she wanted. He started grumbling about women
and their indecisiveness.
TRECE SAID SOMETHING ABOUT HIS GENDER STEREOTYPING
He said he was just a Wizard, not a miracle worker.
THEN SHE BROUGHT UP HIS NAPOLEON COMPLEX
Sure, he can grant a few wishes, spring for some glittery
pumps, cab Fare, but thats about his limit.
THE YELLOW BRICK ROAD... A DOOMED FORAY
And Una, well, that Unas no innocent lil
Dorothy and the wizards no psychotherapist.
Besides, therapy never seems to work for Una.
QUEEN OF DENIAL
Shes always looking for the quick fix.
AND SOMEONE ELSE TO INJECT HER WITH IT
Always falling in love with the idea. And like her little
bees, dying every fall.
PEOPLE WOULDNT FALL IN LOVE IF IT DIDNT HURT
[Points to card holder]
[Facing reflection again]
Like her precious queen, she kills them off one by one.
Leaving them dead. Gutless.
No. Maybe thats how it was,
maybe Ive fallen a few times,
but Im getting back on my feet now.
STILL WEARING THOSE TACKY PUMPS, TOO
Moving forward. Leaving the old me behind.
MUST BE HARD WALKING AWAY IN THOSE HIDEOUS THINGS
This times gonna be different.
Im better off this time around.
Nothings gonna stand in my way.
Old friends were bringing me down, anyway.
Never her fault. How can it be?
SHE DOESNT KNOW WHO SHE IS
Born color blind, poor thing, only dreams black and
white. Knows theres a pot of gold at the end of the
rainbow, but wouldnt know how one rainy day could
differ from any other. Shes been walking around on
her hands for so long. Blood rushing to her head, heart
slowly draining... afraid to let her feet touch the
FORGOT ALL ABOUT EXERCISING HER SOUL
Afraid they might land her in quicksand. And so sick of
herself that she hides from her.
SHES GOTTA GRIP THE PRINCIPLE OF POLARITY
Shes only a fraction of what she could be. A
quarter of the half that could combine to make her whole.
A quarter? Can you spare a quarter?
Cuz Ive just gotta reach out and touch someone.
I need to let my fingers do the walking.
Ive gotta call home, cuz theres no place
like. . .
HASNT BEEN HOME SINCE LAST YEAR
I gotta call ahead cuz Im bringing home my baby
bumble bee and theyll need to set an extra place
at the table for me and my honey...
She thinks definition can be found in another.
SHE READS THE DICTIONARY
Sometimes she knows better.
BUT SHE HASNT QUITE COME TO TERMS
Like when lovers introduce her. Id like you
to meet my partner, Una.
THIS PROPERTY BELONGS TO...
Turns tail and runs away as fast as those little legs can
carry her. Such a mercurial sort...
GEMINIS ARE RULED BY MERCURY
Follows that scattered head of hers. Una tells em
all to go to hell and if that doesnt work
shell just drive them there herself.
MERCURY IN GREEK = HERMES
Hasnt felt a pulse in so long, probably
doesnt even remember she has a heart. So mutable.
So capricious. So confused. Keeps thinking she can go
home and the little girl with the bee sting is just gonna
whisper truth in her ear and shell walk away
changed. Thinks theres a secret can fix everything
if only she knew...
Oh were off to see the wizard...
Yeah we. This time Im traveling with my three
And when we see the wizard, were gonna ask him for
SEE NO EVIL
HEAR NO EVIL
and a voice
SPEAK NO EVIL
and there wont be a secret anymore.
When I bring home my baby bumble bee
will my mama be so proud of me?
Shes allergic to bees. Puffs up like a zeppelin.
Never learns. Let her damn bees kill off her last
Smothered: she couldnt breathe enough for em
Miss Mary mack mack mack
all dressed in black black black
too bad its gone gone gone,
Id like it back back back.
When she wants something so mechanical she oughta look
away and just stick to that battery operated lover that
fits so nicely in her purse...
ITS A MINI-PEARL
No, what I really I want is to grow a stinger of my own.
She wants the power to hurt. Best defense is a good
SHE WANTS LOVE
[Trece turns to cue holder]
[Cue holder sticks tongue out at Trece]
Im so sorry baby. Mama never told me
not to play with my bees. So very sorry, baby,
but could you please just give me that stinger
now before I forget what it is I wanted?
FEAR THE BEE
I know I shoulda squashed that bee when I had the chance.
I just wanted to taste your honey, baby,
but I couldnt get close enough without it stinging.
So now Im growing my wings, gonna fly fly fly...
SOLO THIS TIME
Before the sands run out and you die, my pretty.
Yesterday catches up with today,
FORGIVE NOT FORGET
sets sights on tomorrow.
Stingers lead to antibiotics
which only brought the swelling down.
Closest Ive come to god
or salvation was a green and yellow pill.
Now the fucking monkeys stole my fix,
spilled my secrets and were outside looking in.
She knows who I am.
Yes, but who am I?
ANSWER IN THE FORM OF A QUESTION
Who is Una?
THIS IS FINAL JEOPARDY
I am Una. And Im bringing home my baby bumble bee.
EMBRACING THE PRINCIPLE
And Im clicking my heels
cuz theres no place like home
and Im gonna go find it.
Theres no place like home.
Theres no place like home.
Theres no place like home.
OBJECTS IN MIRROR MAY BE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR
[Unas cheek is pressed to glass of mirror]
Mirror, Mirror on the wall,
whos the fairest one of all?
You are, Una.
[Kisses reflection and turns away from mirror.]